CD Review: Gwar “The New Dark Ages”

“The New Dark Ages”

Slave Pit Records
Tracks: 15

Our score 3 out of 5 stars

When Earth is threatened by Ancient and unspeakable terrors there is only one group of crack fueled, intergalactic creatures that can help put a stop to the mysterious forces that threaten to bring an End to the Age of Man. The ever-loveable GWAR return with their 15th studio album titled “The New Dark Ages” to take on all those who threaten their home away from home know as Earth. The album is being released via the bands own Slave Pit Records and features fifteen tracks which titillate some and scare other.

Much like the previous few releases from the band “The New Dark Ages” is a concept album which documents the ongoing adventures of everyone’s favorite space aliens. In their latest endeavor the five members must once again save mankind by rediscovering long forgotten powers which are needed to defeat their latest foe. The underlying narrative weaves in and out of tracks like “Berserker Mode” a thrash infused face-melter that goes straight for the throat and “Rise Again” an eerie sonic scape brimming over with instrumentation that is an equal blending of soulfulness and crunch. Tracks like “Completely Fucked” and “Ratcatcher” employ GWAR’s signature tongue and cheek lyricism backed by needling instrumentation which continually pokes at your cortex throughout the duration of the track. Other tracks worth checking out are “The Cutter” which features a guest performance by Halestorm frontwoman Lzzy Hale and “Bored to Death” which has guitarist Pustulus Maximus handling the vocal duties for this classic thrasher which I guarantee will have you banging your head by the first chorus.

GWAR’s latest album “The New Dark Ages” may not be their most cohesive record however it certainly shows the band still is not afraid of trying something different while at the same time not completely reinventing the wheel. “The New Dark Ages” comes packed with plenty of great guitar riffs, pounding drums and side-splitting lyrics that will sit nicely with Bohabs both young and old for many eternities to come.

“The New Dark Ages” Track Listing:

1.) New Dark Age
2.) Blood Libel
3.) Berserker Mode
4.) Mother Fucking Liar
5.) Unto the Breach
6.) Completely Fucked
7.) The Cutter
8.) Rise Again
9.) The Beast Will Eat Itself
10.) Venom of the Platypus
11.) Ratcatcher
12.) Bored to Death
13.) Temple Ascent
14.) Starving Gods
15.) Deus Ex Monstrum

GWAR To Release “The New Dark Ages” June 3rd on CD and Digital / September 16th on Vinyl and Cassette

Partners With Z2 Comics For Graphic Novel “GWAR In the Duoverse of Absurdity”

GWAR is set to release their ambitious new album “The New Dark Ages” June 3rd on CD and Digital, and on September 16th on Vinyl and Cassette via GWAR’s own label Pit Records. Pre-orders are available at:

The album concept is tied to a companion graphic novel, “GWAR In the Duoverse of Absurdity,” which will be released by Z2 Comics on June 3rd. In the graphic novel the band are sucked off into an alternate universe to do battle with their evil twins and the specter of rogue technology. On “The New Dark Ages” our heroes floorboard it through a kaleidoscope of hard driving heavy metal, and rock-n-fucking roll, building on their hilarious mythos, introducing cool new characters, and cataloging mankind’s hapless abandonment of their passions, rituals, and beliefs.

The Berserker Blóthar says: “This is the greatest rock record of all time. These are the songs for a new age, a New Dark Age, when men live by the dimming light of a technology destined to betray them. Listen, as we have a rock and roll orgy in the ruins of the world to celebrate humanity’s descent into an age of darkness, disease, ignorance, and death.”

“The New Dark Ages” is available for pre-order on cassette, CD, and multiple different colors of vinyl (whiskey, sunbolt and black/gold marble) and the graphic novel as both soft and hard cover. Bundles are available including ones with Blóthar bobbleheads, and a one of a kind Beefcake helmet. See them all at

You’ve read the album, now hear the book!

“GWAR in the Duoverse of Absurdity” chronicles the epic battle between GWAR and their doppelgangers from an alternate universe the band discovers behind their treasured Magic Mirror. The book uses an innovative storytelling technique that combines words and pictures printed on paper (made from real trees!) in a seamless format we are calling a “graphic novel.” The tale is illustrated by the masterful talents of Andy MacDonald (Wolverine, Dr Strange, Wonder Woman), Shane White (Things Undone, Braun, Endless Summer), Matt Maguire (GWAR) and Bob Gorman (GWAR). Z2 Comics (Judas Priest, Dio, Anthrax) have teamed up with GWAR to produce what will surely be known as the ultimate illustrated saga of the beloved Scumdogs of the Duoverse.

“This was the most utterly engrossing book I’ve ever read! I couldn’t wait until I’d read what was on the page before I was compelled to turn it! This novel has the one element that is missing in so many so-called literary masterpieces: It’s about me!”
-Bälsäc The Jaws ‘o Death

“GWAR has made sure that this story is a full throttle hysterical ride into tipping every sacred cow possible and I consider it an honor to help bring this chapter of the band’s legacy to fetid, pulsing, life.”

Produced by Ronan Murphy
Album Artwork by Alex Horley

Stay tuned for more news and music from the forthcoming album “The New Dark

Kansas City Theater Review: “Rock of Ages”

Starlight Theater - Kansas City, Missouri
May 31, 2019

My first Broadway show was “42nd Street” in 1981. Yes, I’m old. But I’m also able to tell people that I saw Jerry Orbach on Broadway. And Julie Andrews. And Chita Rivera. But enough about me. I’ve seen plenty of shows in the past three-plus decades but I have never seen anything as fun and exciting as “Rock of Ages.”

Our story begins in the small town of Paola, Kansas. Yes, it’s a real town and, yes, it’s really small. My son’s baseball team used to play there every year and I remember the big hoopla when Walmart showed up! We meet Sherrie (Katie LaMark). She’s a small town girl…living in a lonely world. And her dream is to make it to Hollywood to pursue an acting career. Despite her parent’s disapproval she heads west and ends up on the Sunset Strip. She is soon mugged and is rescued by Drew (Anthony Nuccio). Drew works at the Bourbon Club, famous for helping launch the careers of many a band. Drew gets Sherrie a job and soon….well, you’ll have to see the show.

I’ve been seeing shows at Starlight for years, and this was, by far, the BEST one I’ve ever seen there. I had only seen the film so I wasn’t prepared for my evening at the Bourbon Club. The music is all classic 80s rock and metal hits. Pretty much every band you can remember is represented. Except, ironically, Def Leppard, whose hit song gives the show it’s name. We are told by the Narrator (an amazing John-Michael Breen) that there is no Leppard in the show because the band wouldn’t license their music. Ironic, isn’t it?

The performances were also outstanding. As Sherrie and Drew, LaMark and Nuccio have a strong chemistry and an underlying sweetness that has you rooting for them. Both also have great voices. During “Oh, Sherrie” Mr. Nuccio held one note for an amazing 33 seconds, which brought the already enthusiastic audience to near euphoria. I would love to see him tackle the lead in “Jekyll and Hyde.” And extra credit to Ms. LaMark for dealing with a major technical glitch (her face mic was not working at the beginning of Act II and, with her character having to remain on stage for some time, delivered a strong performance using a hand-held microphone. Also credit to the tech crew because, in the few seconds she was able to go off-stage, the problem was corrected. Fine performances were also delivered by the supporting cast, with many in the audience falling under the spell of Sam Harvey, who plays quintessential (and problem child) front man Stacee Jaxx – which is possibly the coolest rock star name ever. And I would be remiss if I didn’t give a shout out to the kick-ass band that provides the music.

I’m saving this paragraph for the highlight of the show – John-Michael Breen. He not only narrates the show but appears as the Bourbon Club’s sound guy, Lonny. Lonny loves three things. Rock and Roll and his Fogmaster 5000 fog machine are two of them. Mr. Breen gives the show the majority of it’s laughs and both the cast and the audience feed off of his enthusiasm. I will definitely keep an eye on his career and hope to catch him on stage in the future.

As I said in the beginning, I’ve seen some great Broadway shows, from “Phantom” to “Les Miz” – from “Cats” to “Spamalot – and “Rock of Ages” has definitely jumped onto my all-time favorites list.

“Rock of Ages” is only in Kansas City through Sunday, June 2nd. For information on upcoming tour dates, click HERE.

“Under the Wizard Moon” – A Great Book for Children of All Ages!

Under the Wizard Moon
Author:  Aunt Raini – some illustrations by Nikki D. Caravella
Publisher:  Art Bookbindery
Hardcover – 36 pages
A weaver of dreams.  A talking toad.  And kittens that roam at night.
These are just a few of the magical characters you’ll meet in the new book for children of all ages, “Under the Wizard Moon.”
Full of smartly written poems, and brilliantly illustrated by both the author and PhoenixIllustrations’ Nikki D. Caravella, the stories are fun to read while the brightly colored accompanying illustrations will help describe the story even more.  And while some things may naturally frighten small children, the wordplay used will soon make them friendly and acceptable, an important lesson for children.  Of all ages.
To order a copy of “Under the Wizard Moon,” you can contact her on her Facebook page HERE

Beware the Kitties at Night!


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Blu-ray Review “Rock of Ages: Extended Edition”

Starring: Tom Cruise, Alec Baldwin, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Julianne Hough, Russell Brand, Bryan Cranston
Director: Adam Shankman
Rated: PG-13 (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Studio: Warner Bros.
DVD Release Date: October 9, 2012
Run Time: 123 minutes

Film: 3.5 out of 5 stars
Extras: 3.5 out of 5 stars

When it comes to Broadway plays being converted into feature films, it is hit or miss.  “Rock of Ages” is an amazing play that translates into a good movie with great music.  This film features the amazing musical hits of Def Leppard, Foreigner, Journey, Poison, REO Speedwagon, Twisted Sister and more.  The movie gets lost a little in the music, which is a good thing. This release features the extended edition of the film, which features over 13 additional minutes of more songs, more dancing and more laughs.  I really enjoyed the extended cut much more, which is rare in a release. Director Adam Shankman knows how to correctly turn a stage play into a feature-film, like he did with “Hairspray”.   Russell Brand, Paul Giamatti, Catherine Zeta-Jones are great but for me personally Alec Baldwin and Tom Cruise really steal the show. Must watch for fans of great 80’s music, you will easily find yourself air-guitaring and singing along.

Warner delivers a fantastic Blu-ray presentation.  The 1080p video transfer really looks perfect and showcases the film’s fantastic set designs.  Since music in the film is very important, the DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 really gets a chance to shine and really belt out the hits.  The special features are equally as good as the film itself.  “Rock of Ages: Legends of the Sunset Strip Hosted by Bret Michaels” let’s you hear from the musicians like Def Leppard, Poison, Whitesnake, Foreigner, Twisted Sister, and more as they chat about the good ‘ole days. “The Stories We Sing” gives the behind the scenes stories on our favorite rock anthems of the 80’s. “Defining a Decade” features the cast/crew as they show us how they created the 80’s.  There is a music featurettes for “Any Way You Want”. Lastly there is a look into the “Rock of Ages” premiere with “Def Leppard – LIVE!”.

Premise: “Rock of Ages” tells the story of small town girl Sherrie and city boy Drew, who meet on the Sunset Strip while pursuing their Hollywood dreams. Their rock ‘n’ roll romance is told through the heart-pounding hits of Def Leppard, Joan Jett, Journey, Foreigner, Bon Jovi, Night Ranger, REO Speedwagon, Pat Benatar, Twisted Sister, Poison, Whitesnake, and more.

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Film Review “Rock of Ages”

Starring: Julianne Hough, Diego Boneta and Tom Cruise
Directed by: Adam Shankman
Rated: PG 13
Running time: 2 hours 3 mins
Warner Brothers

Our Score: 3.5 out of 5 stars

It sounded like a good idea. Take a bunch of popular song from an era long past, add some singers and a couple of actor cameos and, voila, you have…”Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band.” Best known for being the only film in which Carol Channing, Leif Garrett and “Bowzer” from Sha Na all appear, the film was blasted for being nothing more but a bunch of hit songs strung together (though it does have a small place in my heart and in my DVD collection). But like the saying goes, that was then; this is now! Or at least 1987.

Small town girl Sherrie Christian (Hough) arrives in seedy Los Angeles from her small Oklahoma town via bus. After having her suitcase stolen (not to worry, the only thing in it were her albums) she ends up at a popular rock and roll club called the Bourbon. There she meets bar assistant Drew Boley (Boneta), who convinces his boss, Dennis (Alec Baldwin) to give her a job. Sherrie is a singer and she KNOWS that soon she’ll be, as John Lennon used to say, “the toppermost of the poppermost!”

Full of some of the biggest songs of the late 1980s (I hate to use the words “rock and roll” because, and no offense to Kevin Cronan or R.E.O. Speedwagon, but “I Can’t Fight This Feeling” is NOT a rock song!), “Rock of Ages” is almost like one of the old Hollywood musicals where everyone gets together and puts on a show in the barn. In this show, somebody just put a bunch of songs in a show and wrote a story around them. Sherrie Christian only has that name so that everyone on that night bus from Oklahoma can sing Night Ranger’s “Sister Christian” while, when Sherrie’s name is mentioned, you get a few bars of Steve Perry’s “Oh, Sherrie!” They did the same thing in “Sgt Peppers” when they named Peter Frampton’s love interest “Strawberry Fields.”

At least the cast has fun. Hough is engaging enough as a girl who must follow her own dreams, no matter the sacrifice. Boneta starts off shaky. His character claims to have stage fright but he has no problem butchering “Juke Box Hero” inside a crowded record store. But it’s the rest of the cast that make me recommend this film. As a Tipper Gore-like mayoral wife, Oscar winner Catherine Zeta-Jones gets to belt out some Pat Benatar while channeling Michael Jackson’s moves from the “Beat It” video. Baldwin is a hoot as is Russell Brand, as his assistant. But the star here is Cruise, who stars as Stacee Jaxx, lead singer of the band Arsenal looking to go solo. And when he announces that he’ll be giving his first performance as a single on the big stage at the Bournon, Jaxx rocks the house. Part “The Jungle Book’s” Kaa, the snake and part Guns and Rose’s Axl Rose, Cruise rocks the house’s socks off! He has the look and moves of a bonafide rock star, as well as a more then passible voice. When Cruise is on screen the film come to life! The songs are catchy (they should be, they’re pretty well known) and Shankman’s direction is brilliant. He did a great job adapting “Hairspray” from Broadway and does the same here. The script is hit or miss, with one of the biggest misses being Sherrie pretty much meets Drew, gets a job, buys new clothes, gets a place to live AND finds the cure for cancer all in one week’s time. Just kidding about the cancer curing.