Film Review: “The Exorcism of Saint Patrick”

Starring: Steve Pinder, Michael J. Cline and Maya Jeyam
Directed by: Quinn Armstrong
Rated: NR
Running Time: 90 minutes
Cranked Up Films

Our Score: 3 out of 5 Stars

Horror is truly different for everyone. For me, it’s spiders. Most bugs I’ll get up and close with kleenex to dispose of, but if I spot a spider, I’m grabbing the nearest blunt object and potentially putting a hole in the wall. For others, it could be a variety of things, blood and guts, unnatural fears, possession, clowns, etc. For some, a film like “The Exorcism of Saint Patrick” is an all too real microscope on their own trauma that they’ve dealt with.

The film is primarily between Pastor Pat (Steven Pinder) and Patrick (Michael J. Cline). The two are at a lonesome cabin near the woods because Patrick’s parents want Pastor Pat to convert him. Not to Christianity, but to heterosexuality. The shy, bullied teenager is bullied even further by Pastor Pat. Pastor Pat only refers to him as Trick, basically implying that once he renounces his homosexuality, he’ll actually be identified as a person. Pastor Pat forces him to do repetitive demeaning tasks, belittles him, hits him, and a variety of other cruel “treatments.” Patrick is unwilling, afraid and alone, emphasized by how much his parents hope Pastor Pat’s “treatment” works. The film quickly addresses and touches on topics of LGBTQ+ oppression, suicide, assault, depression and it’s only a matter of time before past, deceased patients of Pastor Pat decide his reign of terror needs to end.

The first half of “The Exorcism of Saint Patrick” can easily be a real life horror of its own, before it takes a supernatural turn. The film is way more layered than what I’ve laid out, showing hints of Pastor Pat’s own personal sexual repression, as well as how he channels that into his profession and tactics. The dialogue between the two, at times, feels thoughtfully introspective. That being said, it doesn’t necessarily make Pastor Pat sympathetic because he has clearly channeled his own problems into undeniable cruelty.

As for whether or not the supernatural elements equal horror, I’m a little inclined to say it doesn’t necessarily coalesce in the end. The film does seem to drag a bit as it reaches the finish line. The film makes great use of practical gore, blood and other bodily fluid practical effects throughout, but it felt more like a drama than a horror. That being said, “The Exorcism of Saint Patrick” is terrifying for a certain segment who’ve had their sexuality questioned to the point of harm. The other aspect of this film is that it’s the first of a trilogy of anthology films, referred to as “Fresh Hell,” by writer-director Quinn Armstrong. Depending on how the following films shape-up, Armstrong is either exploring the individual horrors we all deal with or showing the wide-ranging ability of horror to be fun, scary and serious.

Film Review: “Satranic Panic”

Starring: Cassie Hamilton, Zarif and Chris Asimos
Directed by: Alice Maio Mackay
Rated: NR
Running Time: 81 minutes
Dark Star Pictures

Our Score: 3 out of 5 Stars

On one hand, “Satranic Panic” is a film featuring heaping doses of drag shows, demons and dismemberment. What more could you honestly ask for in an LGBTQ+ horror film? On the other hand, the film does something you wouldn’t expect in between scenes of blood and viscera, it makes you want to have a drink or a smoke with its characters while lending an ear as they discuss what’s on their world weary shoulders.

Aria (Cassie Hamilton) rules the stage, belting out mesmerizing songs that may or may not serve as plot points. Off stage, she misses Max (Sebastien Grech), the boyfriend of her best friend, Jay (Zarif). They casually recount, which helps set up the bizarre and sometimes comedic tone of the film, how Jay was murdered by Satanists, or at the very least, a group of people who enjoy demonic looking cult attire. During the discussion backstage, they’re attacked by a well-dress hillbilly man who shapeshifts into a demon. The encounter has convinced Aira and Jay that it’s finally time to find Max’s killers and get revenge, especially since Aria has demon sensing abilities, thanks to an estrogen shot.

While the plot comes off as chaotic, it’s never confusing. Instead of bogging the viewer down in more otherworldly details, it manages to take the cast from one adventurous excursion to another, while unveiling more about the emotional baggage and turmoil each character brings with them on the trip. Of course, the film has a villain and there is a connection between the cult who killed Max and the random appearances of demons. The villain represents what you can pretty much you can piece together from the title and cast of predominantly queer, nonbinary and trans individuals.

This was one of the many films I was unable to catch at 2024’s Panic Fest, which is a shame because this is the kind of film that works best with a crowd. While the laughs would be hearty, the attention to emotional reveals would be palpable by the hundreds of glued eyeballs on the screen. “Satranic Panic” has a bit of a Troma charm to it, which means it’s far from being a mainstream film and will be adored by horror fans. Generally speaking, horror has been a safe haven for the outcasts of society. Seeing the trans community swipe back at Christian nationalists who believe someone’s sexuality is the downfall of society, wouldn’t quite resonate as much as it does outside the horror fanbase and LGBTQ+ community.

Despite “Satranic Panic” being her fourth film, there’s this likable first-time indie vibe that permeates throughout director/writer Alice Maio Mackay’s work. It’s surprising because the vibe radiates underneath the cheeky and emotional confidence of its cast (with major props to Hamilton and Chris Asimos), its gloomy neon glow and ludicrous plot that makes us feel genuine connections to our characters on their chaotic road trip. While the movie sometimes fails to balance its cheese and seriousness, especially with it’s underlying themes, “Satranic Panic” is still an entertaining embodiment of gory cinematic passion.